Thursday, November 5, 2009
Tears in my Eyes
I'm a sucker for a tear-jerker movie! I've gotten a little "tougher" over the years, funny because my husband, at 54, is getting more and more emotional as he gets older. At least he shows it more! So, you get a tear-jerker and both of us together, well...
I was born in 1959, so, really the 60s for me, were the times when I was riding my trike, holding a piece of straw between my fingers, pretending it was a cigarette, and making a clicking sound that meant I was in my car with my turn signal on. When I look at magazines and movies from the 60s, they really seemed to make that look like a cool thing to do. My own boring parents didn't smoke (my dad had, but quit b/f I ever remembered it), only had 2 beers at one time at the most. When my friends had exciting lives, going to different parents houses b/c their's were divorced, I had just one home, poor me lol. They got 2 Christmases, too!
My dad owned his own business, so, when my best friend would tell me she was getting a pair of shoes on "payday", I could never figure out what she was talking about. I got shoes when I needed them. My mom was very good at setting aside for needs, so I never noticed a need not taken care of in our home. I thought we were rich, but my sister remembers it a lot differently. While I loved hand-me-downs, and thought we got them b/c people were just really nice and we really liked them (true, right?), my sister was embarrassed and hated it. I just could never wait to see what came out of those bags!
OK, I'm getting to the tears! So, I was going through my growing up years in the 70s. I graduated from high school in 77. Let me back up a few months, I got married when I was 17. Not because I "had" to, but....well, for some reason, that's how I started out my adult years. Married at 17. It wasn't a good time after that, except that I got 2 gorgeous kids, all by the time I was 19! I found myself having lived a LOT of years in the space of just a few years. And not a lot of good memories. BUT, the important things, I got my kids! AND, I began seeing my need for God in my life.
I don't know how many Christians might read my blog, but if you are one and were growing up in the 70s, you probably remember the "Keith Green Days". That was an amazing time for me. It was a time, when a lot of contemporary Christian music came from people who had grown up in the 60s, had experienced the drug culture of that time, and came out of it, and found themselves part of the "Jesus Movement". So, by the time I started giving God some thought, because of His persuit of my life, I gave my life to Him. And it turned out to be the sweetest time of my life in many ways. I had some awful things going on all during this time, but I saw so many miracles that God brought me through, so much heartache, and he held me up the whole time. He's done it many times since, but this was my first "true" love! So, I look back at those days, and when I hear the music of that time in my life, it still has a huge impact on me.
I've since re-married, actually by the time I was 25. I've been married almost 25 years, have had my share of trials in life, but consider myself so extremely blessed. So, that brings me to the tears. Tonight, my husband put on the "First Love" video. It is a documentary that has a lot of those singers and songwriters from the Jesus Movement, all brought together for a reunion, several years ago now. They talk about their lives back then, and they are in many ways, such a mirror to my own life. Every time I watch the movie, I cry, my husband gets teary, it's just like looking back into a memory scrapbook of those days. All those emotions come back, and..well, it's poignant. It reminds me of the Keith Green days, before he died in a plane crash, of his ministry, of the fresh new love that many people came to know in those days. His impact on my life, like a lot of people, still lives on.